Music works much the same way that movies/tv/etc. does, except for the fact that it is a little more mathematical. Rather than just rate an album as is, I prefer to break it down by tracks or songs. That way, there is some accountability for any album-padding or lack of consistency.
Another thing that distinguishes music ratings from others is that (and this is entirely me being an iWhore) the easiest way for me to rate music is on my mp3 player, an iPod Nano that I named after my cat (PanPod). The iPod browser does not, at this point, allow for half-stars. Therefore, every track that I listen to gets rated out of just 1, 2, 3, 4, or 5. Therefore, by definition, the worst an album could ever rate would be a 1.00. Once I have accumulated all of the track scores, I'll simply add them up and divide them by the amount of tracks, giving an average track score, or, as I like to call it, the album's rating.
Here's how the scoring works.
1 star - This track is crap. If it has lyrics, you were likely able to guess the second line right after hearing the first. The instrumentation is terrible, and the landscape of music is probably worse for this song's existence. These are minutes of your life that you will never get back and will likely be counted against you on Judgment Day.
2 stars - Either a terrible song with a good hook, or one that has shreds of potential that were left undevelopped.
3 stars - You wouldn't mind hearing this song again, but you're probably fine without. These are okay songs, probably by an artist that you know can do better, but just don't quite grab you like they wish you would. On the other hand, this is also, in the most nostalgic instances, the highest rating allowed for music that you know is garbage, but you still love so So much.
4 stars - This is a song that stands out as being one that you want to hear again. It likely has a sound that has hooked you, lyrics that have illicited thought or even emotion, or has an undefinable quality of goodness that you can't ignore.
5 stars - Sublimity. Listening to this song, you cease to think about it critically and simply become absorbed into it. The first time you heard it, you likely had chills. The thirtieth time, the feeling is the same, if not more intense.
Let us keep in mind that there is no such thing as a half-star when talking about music. And, since, there is no lower than a 1 star, the logical process is to round up. A half star becomes a 1 star, 1.5 becomes 2, etc.
I will let you know right off the hop that I am cheap with my 5-stars. I don't think I have ever given more than 2 to a single album. Thereford, while a 5.00, or even a 4.00 is theoretically possible, I have yet to be blown away enough by total work of music to score something that highly. Keeping that in mind, I have listened to several albums that many people consider to be the greatest of all time, so I doubt that the 4.00 barrier is going to be broken anytime soon. For the record, the highest I have ever rated an album is 3.92 (U2 - Achtung Baby and The White Stripes - Icky Thump), while the lowest is *NSync - *NSync with 1.82.
I am also the first to admit how difficult it is for me to think about music objectively. Some would say that's the point, but I still, nonetheless see it as something of a hindrance. For example: I listened to Arcade Fire's "Funeral" for the first time about a month ago. I gave it an overall 3.60 rating. This puts it in my top 20. "Wake Up," in particular I gave a 4 star to. After listening to it a couple of times, I couldn't figure out where I recognized it from. Then I looked it up, and realized it was the song that sounded so awesome on the trailer for "Where The Wild Things Are." I am also currently reading a book that speaks very, VERY highly of Arcade Fire. Now, without even listening to the song again, I feel inclined to give that song a 5 star. Simply because of an association with a good trailer and someone else's recommendation, I felt the song become better.
Considering this critical fluidity when it comes to music, I likely won't be getting as in depth with my reviews. I will provide the ratings and any thoughts I have about the album in general. This is mostly out of a certainty that I will be wrong.
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