It's January 2nd, and yesterday's Movies of 2011 list proved quite popular, so let's continue the third annual tradition of talking about the 10 movies that I am most looking forward to this year. I realize that with it being so close to the beginning of the year, most of what I've heard about is big franchise blockbuster popcorn flicks but that's never stopped me before.
10) The Lorax - March 2nd
Posted below is one of two trailers I have seen for this movie. The first one (not this one) makes The Lorax seem like it's going to be a big mess of Seussian images, dumbing down its environmental messages for the sake of silly gags. This one, which benefits from its Polyphonic Spree backing, making it seem more like Where The Wild Things Are and less like Mars Needs Moms. But, even if it does turn out to be crap, I'm at least worried about it enough to care.
9) Wrath of the Titans - March 30th
I'm a little mad at myself for this one. I was immensely disappointed by Clash of the Titans but something is trying to make me believe that the sequel won't be garbage. I have a dim recollection of a Sam Worthington interview where he talks about using the opportunity to make an un-crap film but since I can't find it anywhere, there is a strong likelihood that it was in a dream.
8) The Avengers - May 4th
If you had asked me two years ago, this would be the easy number 1 or 2 on this list. Then Iron Man 2 happened. Then Thor happened. And while I hear good things about Captain America: The First Avenger I am pretty dubious of any post-Disney Marvel product. I know better than to expect magic from Robert Downey Jr. sequels and I know better than to put all of my eggs into Joss Whedon's basket but I am still hoping that this is the Thor's-lightning-in-a-bottle of awesomeness we all hope it will be.
7) Haywire - January 2nd
I have a tendency to like Steven Soderbergh movies more than most people (see The Limey and Contagion). I also fall for the dazzle of seeing the names of people who I enjoy in movies. Even after the Star Wars prequels, The Men Who Stare At Goats, and the dreadful Angels & Demons, I still believe in Ewan McGregor. I also have no reason not to believe in Michael Fassbender. And, add to that, the headliner debut of Gina Carano. All eyes are going to be on her to see whether this is a novelty act or the start of an impressive career.
6) The Amazing Spider-Man - July 3rd
The biggest concern with this one is the looming threat of redundancy. In such a well-established, and well re-hashed, mythos it remains to be seen whether there is anything left that is worth doing in a movie without beating you over the head with the same story in different clothes. We're going back to the origins, just like every incarnation of Spider-Man but I am hoping that fresh eyes will be able to inject something novel and worthwhile.
5) The Hunger Games - March 23rd
As the spiritual successor of the Twilight phenomenon, The Hunger Games sports a surprising credibility. People who have read it seem to legitimately enjoy it (or maybe I'm not paying close enough attention) and I'm intrigued enough by the trailer to want to see what all the hubbub is about. Even if it's the same kind of story we've seen before (The Long Walk as one example), it seems like it's sporting enough style and substance to be worth a look.
4) Men In Black 3 - May 25th
Say what you will about Will Smith and his absurdly profitable ways, there are few people I trust to entertain me more. I know I'm supposed to be skeptical and bitter about sequels but with a decade of CGI advancements and a long resting period since Smith has done something just plain fun, it seems like the perfect time for a return to the franchise.
3) Brave - June 22nd, 2011
I actually had this one at #2 until I watched the trailer for what has claimed the second spot. However, it's not Brave's fault. Brave *looks* fantastic. Say what you will about Disney and its monolithic destruction of all things childhood but when those cats team up with Pixar, they make some pretty awesome movies. Brave also gives you the extra pleasure of tying itself to an undeniably and, beyond The Secret of Kells, untapped animation goldmine with its Celtic setting. Even if it's crap, I'll have an awesome time just *looking* at Brave.
2) The Cabin in the Woods - April 13th
After what feels like years of waiting, it's finally here. The Internet has been talking about The Cabin in the Woods and the travesty of its being stuck on the shelf. If you haven't heard about it, that's okay. People are mainly excited because, even though it's not directed by Joss Whedon (although he is a producer and co-writer), it's his fanbase that's been screaming for its release. Throwing together a bunch of Whedon-verse actors, plus Chris Hemsworth and that too-pretty-to-be-real guy from Grey's Anatomy, all in a self-conscious horror movie, I have high hopes that this is going to join the ranks of movies like Evil Dead 2 and Shaun of the Dead.
1) The Dark Knight Rises - July 1st
No surprises here. I've got nothing but love for Christopher Nolan (even if I did like The Prestige better than The Dark Knight) and I simply cannot wait to see how this whole Batman thing gets wrapped up. I'm excited about the cast, I'm excited that this is a definitive ending, and I've also set a bit of a challenge for myself to see as little promotional material as possible. I haven't even watched the trailer below, so somebody please let me know if I've accidentally posted "Cake Farts" by mistake.
Showing posts with label Rundowns. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Rundowns. Show all posts
Monday, January 2, 2012
Sunday, January 1, 2012
The Movies of 2011
Well, 2012 has come and gone, and like 12 years before, absolutely nothing happened. I know that the world's not supposed to implode, or turn into a giant radish or whatever until the 21st but I'm getting my skepticism out early. That being said, 2011 has been a year where a bunch of movies have come out and, for the third year running, I plan to rank the ones I saw.
This was an even worse year for theatre-going for me, in that I didn't do very much of it. 2009's list had 26 movies (from Dragonball: Evolution to District 9), while 2010's had a less-remarkable 21 (from Legion to Inception). This year, I only got out to seeing 14 new movies, slightly more than an average of once per month. Hell, I only saw 8 out of the 16 movies I called The Most Anticipated of 2011. But you don't care about any of that. In fact you've probably skipped past this. Purple. Monkey. Dishwasher. Now here's the list!
14) Red Riding Hood
Despite boasting the best-looking cloak cinematography since Spawn, Red Riding Hood is a mess of a film that stands out for having Amanda Seyfried somehow come out unscathed in a movie that me realize that even Gary Oldman makes mistakes.
13) Drive Angry
Nic Cage, whose first name apparently lost two syllables when he became a tool-for-hire, has become a film type all to himself. Like Tyler Perry, Jackie Chan, or Arnold Schwarzenegger, you now go into a Nic Cage movie trying to see if Nic Cage can out-Nic Cage himself. It's not until you've been sitting there for twenty minutes that you realize that you don't actually care and can't wait for it to be over.
12) Sucker Punch
On paper, this seemed like such a good idea. Giant lifelike Samurai statues? Steampunk Nazis? Carla Gugino? That's a recipe for brilliance. Insert clever food-related analogy which eventually leads to the impression that this movie left me disappointed with the somehow undelicious end result.
11) The Rite
The great lie of 2011:
Studio exec: Hey, Colin O'Donoghue, you want the lead role in this movie? Yeah? Okay, we've got some great news for you, we've also got Anthony Hopkins! He's going to be involved in about 40% of the movie. Now don't worry if we throw his name and face onto some posters, that's just to try and put a few butts in the seats. But you, baby, you're the star.
10) Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows
Borrowing from The Hangover's school of thought that sequels should be the exact same thing but just kind of bigger, the same charms of the original continue to be the high points of the follow-up, while its flaws get expanded to the point of muffling the bulk of the fun.
9) Thor
Not unlike last year's The Wolfman, Thor does an incredible job of creating an awesome setting which sets the perfect mood for the adventure. Instead of a fight with a werewolf Anthony Hopkins, however, we get a fight with a giant, fire-breathing robot and an ending that makes you feel like you just watched a two-hour commercial for The Avengers
8) Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2
Oh what high hopes I had for the Harry Potter finale. After the admittedly awesome first part, I was hoping for more of the creative, compelling choices that made it so successful. Instead, we get action sequence after action sequence with throw-outs to the fans that would have otherwise led to outrage.
7) X-Men: First Class
I'll be the first to admit that my taste in X-Men movies doesn't always jive with everyone else's. When it came out, I really liked X-Men: The Last Stand, and I didn't despise X-Men Origins: Wolverine. So I'm not exactly on the First Class bandwagon along with everyone else. For sure it's entertaining, but it's not the genre-game-changer that it was made out to be (that, my friends, was a little movie called Iron Man).
6) The Thing
I suppose it's kind of hypocritical for me to crap on the Sherlock Holmes franchise for doing the same thing twice and then praise The Thing for pretty much the same thing but it's not like you read these things because of my epic credibility anyway. I think the difference comes from the respect that The Thing has for its predecessor. Rather than trying to cut two films out of the same cloth, the 2011 version is a very respectful homage with some fancy new CGI.
5) The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo
With the full review forthcoming, all I can say at this point is that it's not often that movies affect me, or shake me, or leave me wanting to cleanse the world of certain types of people but The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo is notable for being a challenging movie to watch even if it does seem like it suffers from condensation and complexity in its transition from the page.
4) Super 8
When J.J. Abrams does his best Steven Spielberg impression, you end up with a reminder that sometimes there's just such a thing as a good movie. While the ending suffers under the strain of its hokiness, there's plenty of excitement and fun to make a legitimately entertaining movie.
3) Bridesmaids
In the war between people who think that Bridesmaids is an overrated, unfunny steamy pile and those who felt refreshed by seeing a woman poop in a sink, I fall into the latter camp. It's a story about a woman who keeps making us want to choke her for getting in her own way but who we love because she speaks more openly and honestly than we've allowed ourselves to believe women are allowed to.
2) Contagion
Contagion, quite simply, made me scared of everything and not want to die. Intriguing in its exploration of the possible fallout of a murderous flu, it is the film's frightening plausibility that gives it its power and, subsequently, my #2 spot.
1) The Muppets
Look how happy these guys are to win...
You just have to see it to get it. And if you see it, and don't get it, you may need to send a teeny-tiny spelunking team into your body in order to discover why your soul is a shriveled black mass of depression and pain. With its boundless delightfulness and self-conscious nostalgic optimism, The Muppets is the clear winner for best movie of 2011.
This was an even worse year for theatre-going for me, in that I didn't do very much of it. 2009's list had 26 movies (from Dragonball: Evolution to District 9), while 2010's had a less-remarkable 21 (from Legion to Inception). This year, I only got out to seeing 14 new movies, slightly more than an average of once per month. Hell, I only saw 8 out of the 16 movies I called The Most Anticipated of 2011. But you don't care about any of that. In fact you've probably skipped past this. Purple. Monkey. Dishwasher. Now here's the list!
14) Red Riding Hood
Despite boasting the best-looking cloak cinematography since Spawn, Red Riding Hood is a mess of a film that stands out for having Amanda Seyfried somehow come out unscathed in a movie that me realize that even Gary Oldman makes mistakes.
13) Drive Angry
Nic Cage, whose first name apparently lost two syllables when he became a tool-for-hire, has become a film type all to himself. Like Tyler Perry, Jackie Chan, or Arnold Schwarzenegger, you now go into a Nic Cage movie trying to see if Nic Cage can out-Nic Cage himself. It's not until you've been sitting there for twenty minutes that you realize that you don't actually care and can't wait for it to be over.
12) Sucker Punch
On paper, this seemed like such a good idea. Giant lifelike Samurai statues? Steampunk Nazis? Carla Gugino? That's a recipe for brilliance. Insert clever food-related analogy which eventually leads to the impression that this movie left me disappointed with the somehow undelicious end result.
11) The Rite
The great lie of 2011:
Studio exec: Hey, Colin O'Donoghue, you want the lead role in this movie? Yeah? Okay, we've got some great news for you, we've also got Anthony Hopkins! He's going to be involved in about 40% of the movie. Now don't worry if we throw his name and face onto some posters, that's just to try and put a few butts in the seats. But you, baby, you're the star.
10) Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows
Borrowing from The Hangover's school of thought that sequels should be the exact same thing but just kind of bigger, the same charms of the original continue to be the high points of the follow-up, while its flaws get expanded to the point of muffling the bulk of the fun.
9) Thor
Not unlike last year's The Wolfman, Thor does an incredible job of creating an awesome setting which sets the perfect mood for the adventure. Instead of a fight with a werewolf Anthony Hopkins, however, we get a fight with a giant, fire-breathing robot and an ending that makes you feel like you just watched a two-hour commercial for The Avengers
8) Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2
Oh what high hopes I had for the Harry Potter finale. After the admittedly awesome first part, I was hoping for more of the creative, compelling choices that made it so successful. Instead, we get action sequence after action sequence with throw-outs to the fans that would have otherwise led to outrage.
7) X-Men: First Class
I'll be the first to admit that my taste in X-Men movies doesn't always jive with everyone else's. When it came out, I really liked X-Men: The Last Stand, and I didn't despise X-Men Origins: Wolverine. So I'm not exactly on the First Class bandwagon along with everyone else. For sure it's entertaining, but it's not the genre-game-changer that it was made out to be (that, my friends, was a little movie called Iron Man).
6) The Thing
I suppose it's kind of hypocritical for me to crap on the Sherlock Holmes franchise for doing the same thing twice and then praise The Thing for pretty much the same thing but it's not like you read these things because of my epic credibility anyway. I think the difference comes from the respect that The Thing has for its predecessor. Rather than trying to cut two films out of the same cloth, the 2011 version is a very respectful homage with some fancy new CGI.
5) The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo
With the full review forthcoming, all I can say at this point is that it's not often that movies affect me, or shake me, or leave me wanting to cleanse the world of certain types of people but The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo is notable for being a challenging movie to watch even if it does seem like it suffers from condensation and complexity in its transition from the page.
4) Super 8
When J.J. Abrams does his best Steven Spielberg impression, you end up with a reminder that sometimes there's just such a thing as a good movie. While the ending suffers under the strain of its hokiness, there's plenty of excitement and fun to make a legitimately entertaining movie.
3) Bridesmaids
In the war between people who think that Bridesmaids is an overrated, unfunny steamy pile and those who felt refreshed by seeing a woman poop in a sink, I fall into the latter camp. It's a story about a woman who keeps making us want to choke her for getting in her own way but who we love because she speaks more openly and honestly than we've allowed ourselves to believe women are allowed to.
2) Contagion
Contagion, quite simply, made me scared of everything and not want to die. Intriguing in its exploration of the possible fallout of a murderous flu, it is the film's frightening plausibility that gives it its power and, subsequently, my #2 spot.
1) The Muppets
Look how happy these guys are to win...
You just have to see it to get it. And if you see it, and don't get it, you may need to send a teeny-tiny spelunking team into your body in order to discover why your soul is a shriveled black mass of depression and pain. With its boundless delightfulness and self-conscious nostalgic optimism, The Muppets is the clear winner for best movie of 2011.
Thursday, January 6, 2011
The Most Anticipated Movies of 2011
After looking back on the movies of 2010, it's time to look forward to the upcoming flicks of 2011. In compiling this list, it has come to my attention that when it comes to anticipating films, I am very much guided by familiarity and nerdliness. Also, if last year's most anticipated of 2010 list is any indication of my predictions, 27% will be among my top five favourites for the year, I won't see 9%, I will feel no resentment but a lack of awe toward another 9%, and 54% of these films will be disappointing, if not outright crap.
Despite that fact, I still like lists, and I've decided I was going to do this, so here goes.
16) Sucker Punch --- Release Date: March 25
I have no strong feelings for Zack Snyder, but if Watchmen is any indication, Sucker Punch is going to look awesome but fall short in the caring-about-anything-except-how-awesome-it-looks department.
15) Happy Feet 2 --- Release Date: November 18
No poster or trailer out yet, but I have fond memories of watching and reviewing Happy Feet. It was the second movie I ever covered, and while I'm kind of embarrassed to link to it, I think there's hope for the sequel. It'll be interesting to see if Happy Feet sequels take a downward turn (see Shrek) or continue to improve, à la Toy Story (so I've heard... as mentioned, I haven't seen Toy Story 3 yet).
14) Winnie The Pooh --- Release Date: July 15
Who doesn't have a soft spot for that tubby little cubby all stuffed with fluff? I have fond memories of watching Pooh's Grand Adventure: The Search For Christopher Robin and, more recently, Pooh's Heffalump Movie. Add Craig Ferguson to the mix, and I don't see how this could go wrong.
13) Hobo With A Shotgun --- Release Date: TBA
Like my excitement for Machete last year, the anticipation I'm feeling for Hobo With A Shotgun is confusing. I'm not old enough to be nostalgic for the these kinds of grainy B-movies. Nor did I get much pleasure out of similar throwback Planet Terror (Death Proof was pretty cool). Nonetheless, I loved the fake trailers from Grindhouse, and I somehow get a weird giddiness when I find out that they are being converted into full-length feature films. So here I am, with the ridiculous Hobo With A Shotgun on my list.
12) Cowboys & Aliens --- Release Date: July 29
Rather than feeling anticipation, I think it would be more accurate to describe myself as curious about this project. Daniel Craig is a great place to start, add in Harrison Ford, led by Jon Favreau, and there is some pretty sweet potential here. It's the premise, though, that has me wondering. It's like reverse-Firefly, and it's either going to be laughable or incredible.
11) Caesar: Rise Of The Apes --- Release Date: June 24
Once again, there is dink-all avaialble in terms of visual media for this project. Also, once again, there is no reason for me to be excited about it, but I'm so freaking curious. The only reason I have to believe that this is going to be any good is because James Franco is attached, and even there, I still have no reason to be interested. The only thing I've ever seen Franco in is the Spider-man series, and, with limited memory of the experience, I remember being kind of irritated with him. Nonetheless, the Internets have warped my opinion of this man, to the point that I am excited to see him host the Oscars, and that I am including a possibly brutally terrible film on this list just because his name is attached.
10) The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo --- Release Date: December 21
Nothing that I can find for posters or trailers yet, but David Fincher makes some pretty damned good movies. I've heard great things about the source material and the original series, so I'm failing to see how Fincher could mess this up. I do resent Rooney Mara for being a part of A Nightmare On Elm Street, but I'm certainly willing to give her a second chance.
9) X-Men: First Class --- Release Date: June 3
Sure, a lot of people hated X-Men Origins: Wolverine, so the whole X-Men franchise has kind of a sour taste for most, but c'mon, this is Matthew Vaughn we're talking about, here. Kick-Ass and Startdust Matthew Vaughn. If there's anyone I trust with this movie, it's him.
8) Thor --- Release Date: May 6
I was excited about Thor, then I saw the original trailer, and I thought it looked like garbage. Now, there's a new trailer (seen above) out that has re-affirmed my faith that this movie may not be crap. Actually, in watching it again, I'm still a little nervous. I hope that the iffiness of the trailers is due to a rushed promotional campaign and not due to a rushed, crappy production à la Iron Man 2.
7) The Muppets --- Release Date: November 23
If Forgetting Sarah Marshall taught me anything, it's that good things happen when Jason Segel goes behind the scenes. I don't have a whole lot of nostalgia to get me as pumped about this project as I could be. I mean, I remember occasionally watching The Muppet Show with my parents, and the Muppet Babies cartoon seems really familiar, but it's mostly Segel that's got my interest here.
6) Sherlock Holmes 2 --- Release Date: December 16
Instead of writing another preview, I present you with the last paragraph from my review of Sherlock Holmes:
The movie also heavily hints at a sequel. Considering its nearly forgettable story, I look forward to another take, giving the chance for the characters to do their stuff with an even more worthwhile case. Really, I could watch these two do anything... except that.... okay, maybe that.
5) Captain America: The First Avenger --- Release Date: July 22
Captain America and Thor would be neck-and-neck except that I haven't seen anything from the former that has shaken my hopes for the movie. I'm shaky at the casting of Chris Evans, but... oh my God, I just noticed that the director is the same man who is responsible for The Wolfman. Well, I'm going to have to just pretend I didn't learn that and keep my hopes up.
4) Your Highness --- Release Date: April 8
I hadn't heard a single thing about this movie until I saw the trailer. Now I want little more than to watch it and roll around in its medieval stoner fantasy goodness. As mentioned before, there's an unsubstantiated love for James Franco, a substantiated love for Natalie Portman, and I'm kind of semi half-aware of who Danny McBride is. But who cares, just watch the trailer and love it.
3) The Green Hornet --- Release Date: January 14
In watching TV recently, I'm feeling a little over-exposed about this movie, but what the hell, it still looks like fun. I think there are about six dozen different trailers out there right now, all seemingly advertising a different kind of movie. Nonetheless, if you piece together the best parts of them, I think (nay, hope) that this movie is going to be as good as it should be.
2) Super 8 --- Release Date: June 10
You now know as much about this movie as I do.
1) Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part II --- Release Date: July 15
I really quite enjoyed Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part I, so much so that I am more excited to see the finale than anything else this coming year. I'm fairly certain that better movies will come along, but this is the end of an era that is ramping up to have an incredibly satisfying last chapter.
Despite that fact, I still like lists, and I've decided I was going to do this, so here goes.
16) Sucker Punch --- Release Date: March 25
I have no strong feelings for Zack Snyder, but if Watchmen is any indication, Sucker Punch is going to look awesome but fall short in the caring-about-anything-except-how-awesome-it-looks department.
15) Happy Feet 2 --- Release Date: November 18
No poster or trailer out yet, but I have fond memories of watching and reviewing Happy Feet. It was the second movie I ever covered, and while I'm kind of embarrassed to link to it, I think there's hope for the sequel. It'll be interesting to see if Happy Feet sequels take a downward turn (see Shrek) or continue to improve, à la Toy Story (so I've heard... as mentioned, I haven't seen Toy Story 3 yet).
14) Winnie The Pooh --- Release Date: July 15
Who doesn't have a soft spot for that tubby little cubby all stuffed with fluff? I have fond memories of watching Pooh's Grand Adventure: The Search For Christopher Robin and, more recently, Pooh's Heffalump Movie. Add Craig Ferguson to the mix, and I don't see how this could go wrong.
13) Hobo With A Shotgun --- Release Date: TBA
Like my excitement for Machete last year, the anticipation I'm feeling for Hobo With A Shotgun is confusing. I'm not old enough to be nostalgic for the these kinds of grainy B-movies. Nor did I get much pleasure out of similar throwback Planet Terror (Death Proof was pretty cool). Nonetheless, I loved the fake trailers from Grindhouse, and I somehow get a weird giddiness when I find out that they are being converted into full-length feature films. So here I am, with the ridiculous Hobo With A Shotgun on my list.
12) Cowboys & Aliens --- Release Date: July 29
Rather than feeling anticipation, I think it would be more accurate to describe myself as curious about this project. Daniel Craig is a great place to start, add in Harrison Ford, led by Jon Favreau, and there is some pretty sweet potential here. It's the premise, though, that has me wondering. It's like reverse-Firefly, and it's either going to be laughable or incredible.
11) Caesar: Rise Of The Apes --- Release Date: June 24
Once again, there is dink-all avaialble in terms of visual media for this project. Also, once again, there is no reason for me to be excited about it, but I'm so freaking curious. The only reason I have to believe that this is going to be any good is because James Franco is attached, and even there, I still have no reason to be interested. The only thing I've ever seen Franco in is the Spider-man series, and, with limited memory of the experience, I remember being kind of irritated with him. Nonetheless, the Internets have warped my opinion of this man, to the point that I am excited to see him host the Oscars, and that I am including a possibly brutally terrible film on this list just because his name is attached.
10) The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo --- Release Date: December 21
Nothing that I can find for posters or trailers yet, but David Fincher makes some pretty damned good movies. I've heard great things about the source material and the original series, so I'm failing to see how Fincher could mess this up. I do resent Rooney Mara for being a part of A Nightmare On Elm Street, but I'm certainly willing to give her a second chance.
9) X-Men: First Class --- Release Date: June 3
Sure, a lot of people hated X-Men Origins: Wolverine, so the whole X-Men franchise has kind of a sour taste for most, but c'mon, this is Matthew Vaughn we're talking about, here. Kick-Ass and Startdust Matthew Vaughn. If there's anyone I trust with this movie, it's him.
8) Thor --- Release Date: May 6
I was excited about Thor, then I saw the original trailer, and I thought it looked like garbage. Now, there's a new trailer (seen above) out that has re-affirmed my faith that this movie may not be crap. Actually, in watching it again, I'm still a little nervous. I hope that the iffiness of the trailers is due to a rushed promotional campaign and not due to a rushed, crappy production à la Iron Man 2.
7) The Muppets --- Release Date: November 23
If Forgetting Sarah Marshall taught me anything, it's that good things happen when Jason Segel goes behind the scenes. I don't have a whole lot of nostalgia to get me as pumped about this project as I could be. I mean, I remember occasionally watching The Muppet Show with my parents, and the Muppet Babies cartoon seems really familiar, but it's mostly Segel that's got my interest here.
6) Sherlock Holmes 2 --- Release Date: December 16
Instead of writing another preview, I present you with the last paragraph from my review of Sherlock Holmes:
The movie also heavily hints at a sequel. Considering its nearly forgettable story, I look forward to another take, giving the chance for the characters to do their stuff with an even more worthwhile case. Really, I could watch these two do anything... except that.... okay, maybe that.
5) Captain America: The First Avenger --- Release Date: July 22
Captain America and Thor would be neck-and-neck except that I haven't seen anything from the former that has shaken my hopes for the movie. I'm shaky at the casting of Chris Evans, but... oh my God, I just noticed that the director is the same man who is responsible for The Wolfman. Well, I'm going to have to just pretend I didn't learn that and keep my hopes up.
4) Your Highness --- Release Date: April 8
I hadn't heard a single thing about this movie until I saw the trailer. Now I want little more than to watch it and roll around in its medieval stoner fantasy goodness. As mentioned before, there's an unsubstantiated love for James Franco, a substantiated love for Natalie Portman, and I'm kind of semi half-aware of who Danny McBride is. But who cares, just watch the trailer and love it.
3) The Green Hornet --- Release Date: January 14
In watching TV recently, I'm feeling a little over-exposed about this movie, but what the hell, it still looks like fun. I think there are about six dozen different trailers out there right now, all seemingly advertising a different kind of movie. Nonetheless, if you piece together the best parts of them, I think (nay, hope) that this movie is going to be as good as it should be.
2) Super 8 --- Release Date: June 10
You now know as much about this movie as I do.
1) Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part II --- Release Date: July 15
I really quite enjoyed Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part I, so much so that I am more excited to see the finale than anything else this coming year. I'm fairly certain that better movies will come along, but this is the end of an era that is ramping up to have an incredibly satisfying last chapter.
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
The Movies of 2010
Well, it's another year later, and once again, I have been looking forward to putting together my list (from best to worst) of every new movie that I have seen this year. This has been a good year for the site, not including the flub from about a month and a half ago where all of a sudden the deathbyhippopotamus.com url stopped linking to where it was supposed to... I'm still not sure if it's entirely fixed. However, the site has been visited on 3,712 different occasions, a relatively small by most Internet standards, but I'm happy with it, and hope to continue to grow into 2011. But, enough about the future, let's look back on the last twelve months.
As with last year, in doing this retrospective/excuse to post a list, I am realizing how many allegedly "good" movies I have failed to see. Here are some notable exceptions that I totally blanked on catching.
127 Hours
Black Swan
Despicable Me
Exit Through The Gift Shop
The Fighter
Four Lions
The Ghost Writer
The Illusionist
The Kids Are All Right
The King's Speech
The Social Network
Tangled
The Town
Toy Story 3
True Grit
And, y'know, any other movie that I don't have listed here. So, let's begin, scraping the bottom of 2010's barrel, as I introduce you to the worst new movie I saw this year.
21) Legion
What the hell, Paul Bettany? What the hell, Kevin Durand? Dennis Quaid, I don't really expect much better, but man, for such a potentially cool premise this movie was absolute garbage.
20) Predators
Having never seen Predator, any sequels, or its contrarian vs. reborquels, I came into this movie with no expectations and left with the need for a long, hot shower.
19. A Nightmare On Elm Street
What the hell, Kellan Lutz? What the hell, Jackie Earle Haley? I don't have any particular fondness for the original movie, but after seeing this remake, Wes Craven's original seems like a security blanket I can use to hide from this mess.
18. Clash Of The Titans
I was so jacked for this movie. Other critics swore by the stupidity of the trailer, but I said, "No, this looks awesome." And, I stand by that. By no means will I be defending the movie, but, given enough time, I'll be able to watch the trailer again, and hopefully my brain will purge the soulless, semi-campy movie it was attached to.
17. Alice In Wonderland
What the hell, Stephen Fry, Alan Rickman, Michael Sheen, Anne Hathaway, Johnny Depp, and Tim Burton? How could you get that many talented people together and make... this? The focus needs to be so much less on "What would it look like if Tim Burton did" and more on "Let's make some good movies, shall we?" Does anyone else remember Big Fish?
16. The Twilight Saga: Eclipse
Moments and tidbits of guilty pleasure are not enough to overcome the unpleasantness that is the sum of this movie's existence.
15. The Crazies
I never bothered to review this one because I saw it on an incredibly faulty pay-per-view system whilst on my honeymoon. I also never bothered to review it, because, by the time we got home, I kept forgetting that it existed until I'd see it on video shelves. Then I'd think "Hey, I should review that," and within moments, I would have forgotten again. Other people tell me it's good, but I think I remember enough to disagree.
14. Daybreakers
This was the first of quite a few frustrating disappointments this year. With its specific vampire mythology, and intriguing cinematographic way of educating us on it, the movie loses its way into a world of clichés and cardboard characters.
13. Devil
Here's another one for the it-could-have-been-better-but-it-wasn't pile. Devil starts to ask some interesting questions, but gives it all up for the sake of pleasant resolution and celebration of Christian forgiveness... or something.
12. Robin Hood
If Robin Hood had at least been the carbon copy of Gladiator it was threatening to be, then I could have just been disappointed by that. Instead, we have this sometimes cool, but often over-tame telling of a sort of familiar story.
11. Iron Man 2
While I've no particular love for Jon Favreau, it was impossible not to sympathize when the outstanding Iron Man gets neutered and Disney-fied in its second time around. No amount of Sam Rockwell dancing can save this hot mess. Well, maybe it can a little bit.
10. The Wolfman
If I'm allowed to only watch the trailer for Clash Of The Titans, then I should also be allowed to only watch the first half of The Wolfman and just *8/make up my own ending.
0.
9. Shutter Island
I don't pretend to be an expert in Scorsese's work, but I do know that Shutter Island ain't no The Departed. It's an interesting enough movie following a man through an investigation with a don't-tell-me-it's-shocking twist ending.
8. How To Train Your Dragon
Aside from the near-constant "awwwww"-ing whenever the lead dragon is on the screen, this movie also brings a bit of importance to its cookie-cutter story, teaching about inclusion and non-violence, while still blowing up a really big dino-dragon.
7. Easy A
I read a review somewhere that this movie is as great as it is because it frees itself from the structures of its 80's predecessors. Whoever said this is bonkers, as Easy A's nostalgic fascination with John Hughes is probably its biggest flaw.
6. The A-Team
This is not high literature. It's over-the-top, often dumb, and so much fun to watch.
5. Jackass 3D
See above.
4. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part I
Albeit incredibly exclusive to anyone unfamiliar with the source material, the sixth film in the series is a sometimes-fun, often harrowing experience that serves as a fantastic penultimate entry to the 7+-book, 8-film investment that is Harry Potter
3. Kick-Ass
It was intriguing, and a whole lot of fun to see the superhero idiom turned on its head, shaken around a bit, then turned back over, settling into a world of uber-violence, and somehow realistic-feeling cartoonish frivolity.
2. Scott Pilgrim vs. The World
Even without being an arcade junkie, Scott Pilgrim rings true and familiar. Stripping away most of the inaccessibly animé-ness of its source materials, the movie panders to the generation of Zelda and Ritalin.
1. Inception
Way too talked about for its own good, Inception was the movie I was most looking forward to this year, and it delivered. Enjoyable supporting characters, unprecedented special effects, and an over-hyped complexity have made for, of the 21 one of seen, the best movie that 2010 had to offer.
As with last year, in doing this retrospective/excuse to post a list, I am realizing how many allegedly "good" movies I have failed to see. Here are some notable exceptions that I totally blanked on catching.
127 Hours
Black Swan
Despicable Me
Exit Through The Gift Shop
The Fighter
Four Lions
The Ghost Writer
The Illusionist
The Kids Are All Right
The King's Speech
The Social Network
Tangled
The Town
Toy Story 3
True Grit
And, y'know, any other movie that I don't have listed here. So, let's begin, scraping the bottom of 2010's barrel, as I introduce you to the worst new movie I saw this year.
21) Legion
What the hell, Paul Bettany? What the hell, Kevin Durand? Dennis Quaid, I don't really expect much better, but man, for such a potentially cool premise this movie was absolute garbage.
20) Predators
Having never seen Predator, any sequels, or its contrarian vs. reborquels, I came into this movie with no expectations and left with the need for a long, hot shower.
19. A Nightmare On Elm Street
What the hell, Kellan Lutz? What the hell, Jackie Earle Haley? I don't have any particular fondness for the original movie, but after seeing this remake, Wes Craven's original seems like a security blanket I can use to hide from this mess.
18. Clash Of The Titans
I was so jacked for this movie. Other critics swore by the stupidity of the trailer, but I said, "No, this looks awesome." And, I stand by that. By no means will I be defending the movie, but, given enough time, I'll be able to watch the trailer again, and hopefully my brain will purge the soulless, semi-campy movie it was attached to.
17. Alice In Wonderland
What the hell, Stephen Fry, Alan Rickman, Michael Sheen, Anne Hathaway, Johnny Depp, and Tim Burton? How could you get that many talented people together and make... this? The focus needs to be so much less on "What would it look like if Tim Burton did
16. The Twilight Saga: Eclipse
Moments and tidbits of guilty pleasure are not enough to overcome the unpleasantness that is the sum of this movie's existence.
15. The Crazies
I never bothered to review this one because I saw it on an incredibly faulty pay-per-view system whilst on my honeymoon. I also never bothered to review it, because, by the time we got home, I kept forgetting that it existed until I'd see it on video shelves. Then I'd think "Hey, I should review that," and within moments, I would have forgotten again. Other people tell me it's good, but I think I remember enough to disagree.
14. Daybreakers
This was the first of quite a few frustrating disappointments this year. With its specific vampire mythology, and intriguing cinematographic way of educating us on it, the movie loses its way into a world of clichés and cardboard characters.
13. Devil
Here's another one for the it-could-have-been-better-but-it-wasn't pile. Devil starts to ask some interesting questions, but gives it all up for the sake of pleasant resolution and celebration of Christian forgiveness... or something.
12. Robin Hood
If Robin Hood had at least been the carbon copy of Gladiator it was threatening to be, then I could have just been disappointed by that. Instead, we have this sometimes cool, but often over-tame telling of a sort of familiar story.
11. Iron Man 2
While I've no particular love for Jon Favreau, it was impossible not to sympathize when the outstanding Iron Man gets neutered and Disney-fied in its second time around. No amount of Sam Rockwell dancing can save this hot mess. Well, maybe it can a little bit.
10. The Wolfman
If I'm allowed to only watch the trailer for Clash Of The Titans, then I should also be allowed to only watch the first half of The Wolfman and just *8/make up my own ending.
0.
9. Shutter Island
I don't pretend to be an expert in Scorsese's work, but I do know that Shutter Island ain't no The Departed. It's an interesting enough movie following a man through an investigation with a don't-tell-me-it's-shocking twist ending.
8. How To Train Your Dragon
Aside from the near-constant "awwwww"-ing whenever the lead dragon is on the screen, this movie also brings a bit of importance to its cookie-cutter story, teaching about inclusion and non-violence, while still blowing up a really big dino-dragon.
7. Easy A
I read a review somewhere that this movie is as great as it is because it frees itself from the structures of its 80's predecessors. Whoever said this is bonkers, as Easy A's nostalgic fascination with John Hughes is probably its biggest flaw.
6. The A-Team
This is not high literature. It's over-the-top, often dumb, and so much fun to watch.
5. Jackass 3D
See above.
4. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part I
Albeit incredibly exclusive to anyone unfamiliar with the source material, the sixth film in the series is a sometimes-fun, often harrowing experience that serves as a fantastic penultimate entry to the 7+-book, 8-film investment that is Harry Potter
3. Kick-Ass
It was intriguing, and a whole lot of fun to see the superhero idiom turned on its head, shaken around a bit, then turned back over, settling into a world of uber-violence, and somehow realistic-feeling cartoonish frivolity.
2. Scott Pilgrim vs. The World
Even without being an arcade junkie, Scott Pilgrim rings true and familiar. Stripping away most of the inaccessibly animé-ness of its source materials, the movie panders to the generation of Zelda and Ritalin.
1. Inception
Way too talked about for its own good, Inception was the movie I was most looking forward to this year, and it delivered. Enjoyable supporting characters, unprecedented special effects, and an over-hyped complexity have made for, of the 21 one of seen, the best movie that 2010 had to offer.
Friday, June 11, 2010
Top 5 Nutbusters
A couple of days ago in the car, it occured to me that there are some things in the world that, despite being nearly impossible, people will invariably attempt. One example is that if you tell people that it is impossible to lick their own elbow, they will likely spend between the next 1 and 10 minutes trying. Along the same line of thinking, if you confront any man, who is comfortable enough to sing in public, with a song that goes insanely far out of his range, he will likely go for it with gusto and little shame. I don't know what compels us to do it, but it's fun to do, and irritating as hell to those around us.
This list is a celebration of the songs that bring this out in us. Each of these songs has a money note that is seductive in its inaccessibility that few men, no matter their voice type, can resist.
*bonus song*
The Lion Sleeps Tonight - The Tokens
This song ends up ineligible because the falsetto happens all the way through, but I have never heard anyone sing it down the octave. If they did, I'd probably scorn them, either to their face, or on this site. Mad props, though, to the theramin-sounding voice in the middle.
5. Bohemian Rhapsody - Queen
The fun starts at 3:16 with the "Galileo"s, but the real testi-rupture happens at the climax at 4:05 with the shrill, piercing high note. Put a group of people together, and ask them to sing along and not a single one will go for one of the lower harmonies.
4. O Night Divine - Traditional
I only post this version because it shows the look that most people get on their faces when they go for the money note. You can see it at 4:08.
3. Grace Kelly - Mika
Just try it. In fact, let's have a contest. If you feel like getting a shout-out, record yourself singing it, put it on Youtube, and I'll link to it. I don't actually have anything to offer to the victor, but I feel like making my reader-monkeys dance.
2. I Believe In A Thing Called Love - The Darkness
How amazing is this video? Even more amazing? Listening to people try to do that third line of the chorus. Generally the first tries end up as warm-up before pretty much finding the right scream the third time around. Or, if you're me, you cuss it up every time but have a blast doing it.
1. Take On Me - a-ha
Did anyone know that a-ha only split up this year? Can anyone name anything other than "Take On Me" that they've done? Regardless, I don't know anyone, except for lead singer Morten Harket, who can make this chorus sound good. This, however, has never stopped any guy from trying. The rest of the chorus builds up anticipation for the climactic moneyshot/note, with a little cuddling afterward. As impossible as it is to hit well, it's even more impossible not to give 'er.
This list is a celebration of the songs that bring this out in us. Each of these songs has a money note that is seductive in its inaccessibility that few men, no matter their voice type, can resist.
*bonus song*
The Lion Sleeps Tonight - The Tokens
This song ends up ineligible because the falsetto happens all the way through, but I have never heard anyone sing it down the octave. If they did, I'd probably scorn them, either to their face, or on this site. Mad props, though, to the theramin-sounding voice in the middle.
5. Bohemian Rhapsody - Queen
The fun starts at 3:16 with the "Galileo"s, but the real testi-rupture happens at the climax at 4:05 with the shrill, piercing high note. Put a group of people together, and ask them to sing along and not a single one will go for one of the lower harmonies.
4. O Night Divine - Traditional
I only post this version because it shows the look that most people get on their faces when they go for the money note. You can see it at 4:08.
3. Grace Kelly - Mika
Just try it. In fact, let's have a contest. If you feel like getting a shout-out, record yourself singing it, put it on Youtube, and I'll link to it. I don't actually have anything to offer to the victor, but I feel like making my reader-monkeys dance.
2. I Believe In A Thing Called Love - The Darkness
How amazing is this video? Even more amazing? Listening to people try to do that third line of the chorus. Generally the first tries end up as warm-up before pretty much finding the right scream the third time around. Or, if you're me, you cuss it up every time but have a blast doing it.
1. Take On Me - a-ha
Did anyone know that a-ha only split up this year? Can anyone name anything other than "Take On Me" that they've done? Regardless, I don't know anyone, except for lead singer Morten Harket, who can make this chorus sound good. This, however, has never stopped any guy from trying. The rest of the chorus builds up anticipation for the climactic moneyshot/note, with a little cuddling afterward. As impossible as it is to hit well, it's even more impossible not to give 'er.
Sunday, January 24, 2010
50 Greatest Artists Of All Time
Last update: March 21st, 2011
Just like my album ratings, the following list is based entirely on mathematical averages. Each album's score is determined by its average track rating. Similarly, each artist's score is determined by its average album rating. In the event of a tie, I just pick my favourite.
Obviously, with this, or any kind of system, there's bound to be some skewing, mostly based on my not having listened to every album ever. For instance, no, I don't think, in all likelihood that The Fray is better than Led Zeppelin, but based on the average album rating of 7 Zeppelin albums (3.47), the one Fray album that I rated at 3.50 puts them higher on the list. Eventually, and ideally, once I have listened to the entire repertoire of popular music, this list can be used as an unequivocal guide, nay, textbook, for learning about the best recording artists in history. Until then, be patient, and feel free to rip me as many new ones as you wish.
50) The Replacements
(1/8 albums, best album: Tim)
49) Jane's Addiction
(1/5 albums, best album: Nothing's Shocking)
48) Ramones
(1/20 albums, best album: Ramones)
47) Eagles
(2/9 albums, best album: Hotel California)
46) Nirvana
(3/6 albums, best album: MTV Unplugged In New York)
45) Creedence Clearwater Revival
(1/9 albums, best album: Cosmo's Factory)
44) David Gray
(1/9 albums, best album: White Ladder)
43) Cat Stevens
(1/14 albums, best album: Tea For The Tillerman)
42) John Lennon
(1/8 albums, best album: John Lennon/Plastic Ono Band)
41) Led Zeppelin
(8/12 albums, best album: Led Zeppelin III)
40) Xavier Rudd
(2/10 albums, best album: Food In The Belly)
39) Nick Cave And The Bad Seeds
(2/16 albums, best album: Let Love In)
38) Panic! At The Disco
(1/3 albums, best album: Pretty. Odd.)
37) Living Colour
(1/10 albums, best album: Vivid)
36) Radiohead
(4/9 albums, best album: Hail To The Thief)
35) The Fray
(1/3 albums, best album: The Fray)
34) Vince Guaraldi
(1/20 albums, best album: A Charlie Brown Christmas)
33) Lifehouse
(1/5 albums, best album: No Name Face)
32) Wings
(1/8 albums, best album: Band On The Run)
31) Simon & Garfunkel
(3/10 albums, best album: Live 1969)
30) Red Hot Chili Peppers
(3/10 albums, best album: Californication)
29) Flight Of The Conchords
(2/4 albums, best album: Flight Of The Conchords)
28) The Dandy Warhols
(2/9 albums, best album: Thirteen Tales From Urban Bohemia)
27) KISS
(1/38 albums, best album: KISS Symphony: Alive IV)
26) Coldplay
(2/6 albums, best album: A Rush Of Blood To The Head)
25) The Who
(2/28 albums, best album: Who's Next)
24) Soundgarden
(1/6 albums, best album: Superunknown)
23) Ani Difranco
(2/34 albums, best album: Revelling/Reckoning)
22) Santana
(1/32 albums, best album: Supernatural)
21) The Smashing Pumpkins
(5/11 albums, best album: Siamese Dream)
20) Nick Drake
(1/4 albums, best album: Pink Moon)
19) The Beatles
(9/31 albums, best album: Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band)
18) Spinal Tap
(1/3 albums, best album: Break Like The Wind)
17) Mika
(1/2 albums, best album: Life In Cartoon Motion)
16) Jean Leloup
(1/7 albums, best album: Le Dôme
15) Blind Melon
(2/4 albums, best album: Soup)
14) John Mayer
(1/10 albums, best album: Heavier Things)
13) Arcade Fire
(1/3 albums, best album: Funeral)
12) The White Stripes
(3/7 albums, best album: Icky Thump)
11) Patti Smith
(1/10 albums, best album: Horses
10) Nine Inch Nails
(1/13 albums, best album: The Downward Spiral)
9) Pink Floyd
(1/17 albums, best album: Dark Side Of The Moon
8) Queen
(1/23 albums, best album: A Night At The Opera)
7) Jimi Hendrix
(3/99 albums, best album: Electric Ladyland)
6) Bruce Springsteen
(2/22 albums, best album: The Rising
5) The Bicycle Thief
(1/1 album, best album: You Come And Go Like A Pop Song)
4) David Bowie
(2/37 albums, best album: The Rise And Fall Of Ziggy Stardust And The Spiders From Mars)
3) Jeff Buckley
(3/4 albums, best album: Grace)
2) Toadies
(1/5 albums, best album: Rubberneck)
1) T. Rex
(1/19 albums, best album: Electric Warrior)
Just like my album ratings, the following list is based entirely on mathematical averages. Each album's score is determined by its average track rating. Similarly, each artist's score is determined by its average album rating. In the event of a tie, I just pick my favourite.
Obviously, with this, or any kind of system, there's bound to be some skewing, mostly based on my not having listened to every album ever. For instance, no, I don't think, in all likelihood that The Fray is better than Led Zeppelin, but based on the average album rating of 7 Zeppelin albums (3.47), the one Fray album that I rated at 3.50 puts them higher on the list. Eventually, and ideally, once I have listened to the entire repertoire of popular music, this list can be used as an unequivocal guide, nay, textbook, for learning about the best recording artists in history. Until then, be patient, and feel free to rip me as many new ones as you wish.
50) The Replacements
(1/8 albums, best album: Tim)
49) Jane's Addiction
(1/5 albums, best album: Nothing's Shocking)
48) Ramones
(1/20 albums, best album: Ramones)
47) Eagles
(2/9 albums, best album: Hotel California)
46) Nirvana
(3/6 albums, best album: MTV Unplugged In New York)
45) Creedence Clearwater Revival
(1/9 albums, best album: Cosmo's Factory)
44) David Gray
(1/9 albums, best album: White Ladder)
43) Cat Stevens
(1/14 albums, best album: Tea For The Tillerman)
42) John Lennon
(1/8 albums, best album: John Lennon/Plastic Ono Band)
41) Led Zeppelin
(8/12 albums, best album: Led Zeppelin III)
40) Xavier Rudd
(2/10 albums, best album: Food In The Belly)
39) Nick Cave And The Bad Seeds
(2/16 albums, best album: Let Love In)
38) Panic! At The Disco
(1/3 albums, best album: Pretty. Odd.)
37) Living Colour
(1/10 albums, best album: Vivid)
36) Radiohead
(4/9 albums, best album: Hail To The Thief)
35) The Fray
(1/3 albums, best album: The Fray)
34) Vince Guaraldi
(1/20 albums, best album: A Charlie Brown Christmas)
33) Lifehouse
(1/5 albums, best album: No Name Face)
32) Wings
(1/8 albums, best album: Band On The Run)
31) Simon & Garfunkel
(3/10 albums, best album: Live 1969)
30) Red Hot Chili Peppers
(3/10 albums, best album: Californication)
29) Flight Of The Conchords
(2/4 albums, best album: Flight Of The Conchords)
28) The Dandy Warhols
(2/9 albums, best album: Thirteen Tales From Urban Bohemia)
27) KISS
(1/38 albums, best album: KISS Symphony: Alive IV)
26) Coldplay
(2/6 albums, best album: A Rush Of Blood To The Head)
25) The Who
(2/28 albums, best album: Who's Next)
24) Soundgarden
(1/6 albums, best album: Superunknown)
23) Ani Difranco
(2/34 albums, best album: Revelling/Reckoning)
22) Santana
(1/32 albums, best album: Supernatural)
21) The Smashing Pumpkins
(5/11 albums, best album: Siamese Dream)
20) Nick Drake
(1/4 albums, best album: Pink Moon)
19) The Beatles
(9/31 albums, best album: Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band)
18) Spinal Tap
(1/3 albums, best album: Break Like The Wind)
17) Mika
(1/2 albums, best album: Life In Cartoon Motion)
16) Jean Leloup
(1/7 albums, best album: Le Dôme
15) Blind Melon
(2/4 albums, best album: Soup)
14) John Mayer
(1/10 albums, best album: Heavier Things)
13) Arcade Fire
(1/3 albums, best album: Funeral)
12) The White Stripes
(3/7 albums, best album: Icky Thump)
11) Patti Smith
(1/10 albums, best album: Horses
10) Nine Inch Nails
(1/13 albums, best album: The Downward Spiral)
9) Pink Floyd
(1/17 albums, best album: Dark Side Of The Moon
8) Queen
(1/23 albums, best album: A Night At The Opera)
7) Jimi Hendrix
(3/99 albums, best album: Electric Ladyland)
6) Bruce Springsteen
(2/22 albums, best album: The Rising
5) The Bicycle Thief
(1/1 album, best album: You Come And Go Like A Pop Song)
4) David Bowie
(2/37 albums, best album: The Rise And Fall Of Ziggy Stardust And The Spiders From Mars)
3) Jeff Buckley
(3/4 albums, best album: Grace)
2) Toadies
(1/5 albums, best album: Rubberneck)
1) T. Rex
(1/19 albums, best album: Electric Warrior)
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
The Most Anticipated Movies of 2010
To go hand-in-hand with the greatest (and worst) movies of 2009, let's look ahead to the coming year. I have high hopes, not only because this New Year's was hopefully the last time that there will ever be these stupid glasses:
What're you gonna do now, without two zeros, huh?
There are also a bunch of movies coming out this year, some of which I'm looking forward to, some, not so much. Below is my list of the Top 10 movies I am most excited for. That doesn't mean that I don't have any apprehension about them, it just means, that on some level, I can be almost certain that at some point this year, my ass will be in a seat, watching a screen with these movies playing on it.
11) The Twilight Saga: Eclipse
Release Date: June 30, 2010
Reason: Because I know I'll be seeing it anyway. And because my fiancee made me put it on here.
10) The Wolfman
Release Date: February 12, 2010
Reason: I'm actually kind of reaching here. It was either this or "Daybreakers." With all of the attention on vampires lately, werewolves have been having to bite the (silver) bullet for their turn. I've heard it suggested that angels are going to be the new vampires, but if Wolfman can get it right, that direction may change. Some of the early buzz has suggested that the film may not be as dark and, well, cool, as the trailer suggests, but I very much hope that buzz is all it is. And besides, when was the last time you were disappointed by an Anthony Hopkins movie (not including Beowulf or Hannibal)?
9) Alice In Wonderland
Release Date: March 5, 2010
Reason: Everyone in the world, except for myself, seems to be pooping themselves with excitement to see this. Maybe I just don't have the same infallible opinion of Tim Burton, but I don't expect great things from this movie. I expect it will look incredible (especially since I'll likely see it in 3D), and that I'll be pleasantly surprised that I don't hate it. I guess I'm looking forward to it because of how much I'm not.
8) Kick-Ass
Release Date: April 16, 2010
Reason: I was more excited for this flick before I saw the trailer. Once I did, it felt less like the Sin City-style bloodbath I was hoping for, and more like Superbad meets the episode of Bones where the kid dresses up like a superhero. Here's hoping that my first impressions were right and that this movie is able to avoid the temptation to be precious without substance.
7) Legion
Release Date: January 22, 2010
Reason: I loves me some Paul Bettany. The general angry-angel in the modern world theme also bears some resemblance to Dogma, but I'm not getting my hopes anywhere near that high. Assuming that the action stays a-rockin' and the the plot doesn't take any preachy turns, I expect to enjoy, but not love sitting through this.
6) Shutter Island
Release Date: February 19, 2010
Reason: The trailer looks kind of interesting. I'm hoping for some ridiculous twists and turns, and I loved The Departed. So, I'm either going to be satisfied or quite disappointed. Either way, I'm sure you'll be hearing all about it.
5) Machete
Release Date: April 16, 2010
Reason:
Need I say more? Except, oh wait, it's got Cheech Marin AND Don Johnson! Nash Bridges, FTW.
4) Clash Of The Titans
Release Date: March 26, 2010
Reason: Sam Worthington, from everyone's beloved Avatar plays Perseus, in what looks, to me, to be a bad-ass swords-and-sandals adventure (props to whoever came up with that expression, by the way). I've heard people say they're mad that they're remaking a movie I've never heard of. I've also heard people say that it looks stupid, based on the trailer. Personally, I don't see it. I see a well edited trailer, filled with various baddies and creatures for Perseus to take on. Granted, Liam Neeson looks quite silly as Zeus, and the money shot of the Kraken is excessive, but damnit, I want to see it, and you can't stop me.
3) Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows, Part 1
Release Date: November 19, 2010
Reason: It's not even so much that I'm excited for this movie that I've been swept up by the excitement. For the last few movies, every time a new trailer comes out (especially when they do that epic powerchord version of the theme) I jump to it and watch it about three times. This is actually the first time that I've seen the poster I just... posted... and, even though you can't see it, there's a bit of a wet spot now on the bed where I'm sitting.
It boggles my mind, because I don't love the movies. I didn't even really love the books. I've just invested so much of my life to the series, that until I see its conclusion, I will not be able to die.
2) Iron Man 2
Release Date: May 7, 2010
Reason: I saw the first one in theatres three times. I have never done that before. It only really happened because I was with various people who hadn't seen it yet, and I said "sure, what the hell?" With that in mind, Iron Man was the charmingest, most thrilling, and simply best superhero movie ever. Whether or not The Dark Knight ended that reign is up for debate, but there is no question that I loved the movie. Having seen the trailer, I'm really stoked, although seeing War Machine doesn't give me the hard-on the rest of the community seems to have (yes, you too, ladies).
1) Inception
Release Date: July 16, 2010
Reason: I am just so friggin' intrigued by this movie. The teasers are just that, vague, but amazing looking visuals that tell you shit all about what's going on. And I don't want to know. Seeing the cast (including Leonardo DiCaprio, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Cillian Murphy, Ellen Page, and Michael Caine!) and knowing it's directed by Christopher Nolan is more than enough for me. That guy has never steered me wrong (except for Insomnia, but I was fifteen and probably didn't really get it). If The Prestige is any inclination of what Nolan tends to present for his between-Batman movies, I am fully prepared to be blown away.
What're you gonna do now, without two zeros, huh?
There are also a bunch of movies coming out this year, some of which I'm looking forward to, some, not so much. Below is my list of the Top 10 movies I am most excited for. That doesn't mean that I don't have any apprehension about them, it just means, that on some level, I can be almost certain that at some point this year, my ass will be in a seat, watching a screen with these movies playing on it.
11) The Twilight Saga: Eclipse
Release Date: June 30, 2010
Reason: Because I know I'll be seeing it anyway. And because my fiancee made me put it on here.
10) The Wolfman
Release Date: February 12, 2010
Reason: I'm actually kind of reaching here. It was either this or "Daybreakers." With all of the attention on vampires lately, werewolves have been having to bite the (silver) bullet for their turn. I've heard it suggested that angels are going to be the new vampires, but if Wolfman can get it right, that direction may change. Some of the early buzz has suggested that the film may not be as dark and, well, cool, as the trailer suggests, but I very much hope that buzz is all it is. And besides, when was the last time you were disappointed by an Anthony Hopkins movie (not including Beowulf or Hannibal)?
9) Alice In Wonderland
Release Date: March 5, 2010
Reason: Everyone in the world, except for myself, seems to be pooping themselves with excitement to see this. Maybe I just don't have the same infallible opinion of Tim Burton, but I don't expect great things from this movie. I expect it will look incredible (especially since I'll likely see it in 3D), and that I'll be pleasantly surprised that I don't hate it. I guess I'm looking forward to it because of how much I'm not.
8) Kick-Ass
Release Date: April 16, 2010
Reason: I was more excited for this flick before I saw the trailer. Once I did, it felt less like the Sin City-style bloodbath I was hoping for, and more like Superbad meets the episode of Bones where the kid dresses up like a superhero. Here's hoping that my first impressions were right and that this movie is able to avoid the temptation to be precious without substance.
7) Legion
Release Date: January 22, 2010
Reason: I loves me some Paul Bettany. The general angry-angel in the modern world theme also bears some resemblance to Dogma, but I'm not getting my hopes anywhere near that high. Assuming that the action stays a-rockin' and the the plot doesn't take any preachy turns, I expect to enjoy, but not love sitting through this.
6) Shutter Island
Release Date: February 19, 2010
Reason: The trailer looks kind of interesting. I'm hoping for some ridiculous twists and turns, and I loved The Departed. So, I'm either going to be satisfied or quite disappointed. Either way, I'm sure you'll be hearing all about it.
5) Machete
Release Date: April 16, 2010
Reason:
Need I say more? Except, oh wait, it's got Cheech Marin AND Don Johnson! Nash Bridges, FTW.
4) Clash Of The Titans
Release Date: March 26, 2010
Reason: Sam Worthington, from everyone's beloved Avatar plays Perseus, in what looks, to me, to be a bad-ass swords-and-sandals adventure (props to whoever came up with that expression, by the way). I've heard people say they're mad that they're remaking a movie I've never heard of. I've also heard people say that it looks stupid, based on the trailer. Personally, I don't see it. I see a well edited trailer, filled with various baddies and creatures for Perseus to take on. Granted, Liam Neeson looks quite silly as Zeus, and the money shot of the Kraken is excessive, but damnit, I want to see it, and you can't stop me.
3) Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows, Part 1
Release Date: November 19, 2010
Reason: It's not even so much that I'm excited for this movie that I've been swept up by the excitement. For the last few movies, every time a new trailer comes out (especially when they do that epic powerchord version of the theme) I jump to it and watch it about three times. This is actually the first time that I've seen the poster I just... posted... and, even though you can't see it, there's a bit of a wet spot now on the bed where I'm sitting.
It boggles my mind, because I don't love the movies. I didn't even really love the books. I've just invested so much of my life to the series, that until I see its conclusion, I will not be able to die.
2) Iron Man 2
Release Date: May 7, 2010
Reason: I saw the first one in theatres three times. I have never done that before. It only really happened because I was with various people who hadn't seen it yet, and I said "sure, what the hell?" With that in mind, Iron Man was the charmingest, most thrilling, and simply best superhero movie ever. Whether or not The Dark Knight ended that reign is up for debate, but there is no question that I loved the movie. Having seen the trailer, I'm really stoked, although seeing War Machine doesn't give me the hard-on the rest of the community seems to have (yes, you too, ladies).
1) Inception
Release Date: July 16, 2010
Reason: I am just so friggin' intrigued by this movie. The teasers are just that, vague, but amazing looking visuals that tell you shit all about what's going on. And I don't want to know. Seeing the cast (including Leonardo DiCaprio, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Cillian Murphy, Ellen Page, and Michael Caine!) and knowing it's directed by Christopher Nolan is more than enough for me. That guy has never steered me wrong (except for Insomnia, but I was fifteen and probably didn't really get it). If The Prestige is any inclination of what Nolan tends to present for his between-Batman movies, I am fully prepared to be blown away.
Sunday, January 3, 2010
The Movies of 2009
From poking around this thing we call the Internet, I have come to understand that there is some kind of obligation to creating "Best Of The (n)Aughts" lists if you run any kind of blog. Having only been part of the scene a little over two months now, I don't feel that I have been watching movies critically enough since the year 2000 to competently compile such a list. Come back in ten years, and I'll probably be able to come up with something. I've even come up with a name for the series of decade-long retrospectives I will undoubtedly compile. I will call it "Hindsight in 2020." Pretty good, eh?
So anyway, the point is, I feel like 2009 has kind of been getting the shaft, since it's at the end of a decade, and everyone is worried about their decade lists. So, for your reading pleasure, I offer up the movies of 2009, that I have seen, listed from worst to best.
*Notable exceptions that I haven't seen (notable status being given by either 1) my wanting to see it, but not having gotten around to it 2) having it be ridiculously successful, and I can't stand feeling different from other people or 3) it coming strongly recommended:
-Paul Blart: Mall Cop, Coraline, Adventureland, The Hangover, (500) Days Of Summer, 9, Up In The Air
And here we go...
26) Dragonball: Evolution
Probably the worst movie I've seen since Freddy Got Fingered. There's just nothing salvageable about it. The lives of the people involved are forever tainted by their involvement in this abysmal violator of childhood memory.
25) The Unborn
It's been awhile. I saw this movie because it was the only thing playing when I dropped into the theatre between two classes. I had done the same a few weeks before and ended up seeing Slumdog Millionaire, so I'm batting .500 . Come to think of it, I remember having a vague interest in seeing it because my temporary man-crush on Cam Gigandet was in its waning stages. Either way, the movie was crap. It tried to be The Exorcist, and I remember something about Nazis, but by no means was it the best demonic possession movie this year.
24) Confessions Of A Shopaholic
If you're ever in the mood for a bad chick flick, where a spoiled girl learns the valuable lesson of sharing, you should still go somewhere else. This movie was the only real blemish on what I considered to be an otherwise perfectly executed surprise Valentine's Day date.
23) Angels & Demons
I'm probably the only person in the world who liked this book better than The DaVinci Code. While not loving the first movie, I resented seeing this one. All of the intrigue, brutality, and pseudo-intelligence that I remember from the book is stripped out, leaving me as cold and lifeless as Tom Hanks' Robert Langdon.
22) Inkheart
The badassery of one cool character (Paul Bettany's Dustfinger), didn't make up for the frustratingly lame elements of the film, for example, every other character. With the premise of a guy who can bring any book to life, the possibilities for where this could have gone were endless, so it's a real shame that where it ended up going was so mediocre.
21) Gamer
Much like the movie that precedes this one on the list, we found ourselves with what had the potential to be a really kick-ass movie, with witty dialogue and maybe even a tasteful warning message about digital media. Instead, we a mildly kick-ass movie, with lame dialogue, and a strong desire to play The Sims... if there were rocket launchers.
20) Year One
This movie was Typecasting 101. Michael Cera plays Michael Cera, while Jack Black plays Jack Black, in a mostly unfunny buddy pictures about two cavemen who make their way through various biblical locations. I can't endorse any movie that makes me disappointed to see Paul Rudd and David Cross.
19) Transformers: Revenge Of The Fallen
I don't really remember the first Transformers movie, except for the fact that I had no idea what was going on. Having not ever played with a Transformer, combined with my inability to keep track of what was going on, I really couldn't have cared less about the sequel. After seeing it, that opinion still stands. With such big, elaborate truck monsters, it's nearly impossible for me to understand which metal giant I am supposed to be cheering for. Also, when "the shard" makes everything it touches turn into a Transformer, it takes away from the relatability of the rest of them. I'm not going to care about some random robot from outerspace, if my toaster just became one.
18) Friday The 13th
The movie's earlier kills are fun and original. That's about all this has going for it, except Aaron Yoo, who I really enjoyed watching be the pathetic, funloving guy, who you're actually kind of sad to see minced up.
17) Push
16) The Twilight Saga: New Moon
15) Trick 'r Treat
14) Avatar
13) Watchmen
Rather than re-write what I think, I'm going to give you guys the contents of an e-mail I wrote to the University of Western Ontario's Gazette, in response to their glowing review:
As an English major, it is my job to see things from different perspectives, to accept divergent opinions, and to generally realize that when it comes to literature, there is no right or wrong. After reading Wednesday's review of Watchmen, I learned that it is very possible for someone to simply be wrong.
To be fair, I would like to set the stage for my own experience of seeing the movie. Despite being a comic book fan, I did not encounter (or even hear about) Watchmen until my second year at Western, when it was assigned as course reading for English 117: Reading Popular Culture. I enjoyed the book immensely. As the release date approached, it was not uncommon for me to go to YouTube to get a Watchmen fix via the film's Smashing Pumpkins-scored trailer. Anyone who knows a 10-17-year old girl will understand what I mean when I say that Watchmen was my Twilight.
Even still, this anticipation was always slightly dampened by doubt that the movie just wasn't going to work. As long as people have been trying to make a Watchmen movie, there have been people (including the graphic novel's author, Alan Moore) who have insisted that in adaptation, Watchmen loses its integrity and literary value. As tempting as it is to imagine Alan Moore as just some crotchety old bastard who has resisted the project for the sake of being a crotchety old bastard, his prediction was completely accurate.
Despite my fanboy status, I wasn't particularly upset or “distraught” about the plot changes. The altered ending makes a hell of a lot more sense for a movie than the original ending. There are some (and I have dabbled with this opinion) who believe that it is, in fact, a better ending. This ending brings the movie's characters closer together and removes the more supernatural elements, ultimately making the story more believable.
Where Watchmen fails is in its mere right to exist. Zack Snyder's goal was always to bring the graphic novel to the movie screen. The attention to visible detail is utterly astounding. Quite often, the film is simply beautiful in its visual translation. Snyder's storyboards (which he drew himself) were quite often taken straight from panels of the comic book. Subsequently, many of the film's scenes are authentically replicated animated tableaus. While this may have been successful technique in the much more visual experience of 300, the flawed, human characters of the Watchmen movie suffer for it. Where Snyder really faces a problem is that any time that there is a deviation from the text in order to make a better movie, the film loses its grip on the fundamental Watchmenness that he is trying so hard to retain. Ultimately it is a battle that is impossible to win. By keeping to the middle, trying to satisfy both camps, we end up with a movie that is neither great on its own nor an entirely faithful adaptation. So, what could Snyder have done better? Probably nothing aside from simply not doing it. Watchmen is not a movie. It is a comic book, and if any good has come from the movie, it is that it has brought people back to the original text. As sales of the graphic novel increase, the movie will serve as a temporary spotlight on a book that shines plenty brightly on its own and deserves its place on Time's “100 Best Novels” list.
As for Kaufman's assertion that the film is a “memorable movie experience which will benefit from repeated viewings”: I saw it twice. I can assure you that my feelings didn't change the second time around.
12) He's Just Not That Into You
This is where the list starts to get to the movies that I enjoyed. This flick was the other half of the aforementioned Valentine's Date, and it definitely got me more points than Confessions Of A Shopaholic did. Like Love, Actually before it (although not as good), HJNTIY is a heart-warming ensemble comedy with enough different, divergent stories to keep you interested and smitten. This movie also has the honour of being only one of two Drew Barrymore movies that I don't loathe (the other being Music & Lyrics).
11) Harry Potter And The Half-Blood Prince
Although not the strongest of the series (OOTP, FTW), Half-Blood Prince is a pretty good adaptation of the novel, as well as a pretty good movie.
10) X-Men Origins: Wolverine
I may be one of the only critics in the world who actually liked this movie (we must stand together, J.R. Jones of the Chicago Reader! I thought it was exciting and fun, but then again, I also enjoyed X-Men: The Last Stand so I must be crazy, right?
9) Sherlock Holmes
8) Up
This may not be the Wall-E-esque masterpiece that it has been made out to be, but it certainly is an enjoyable, touching, and original piece of work. Some of the jokes get a bit tired, and I found the last twenty minutes or so disappointing, but there isn't really any questioning that this was a good movie.
7) Underworld: Rise Of The Lycans
Here's another one that kind of snuck up. I didn't particularly enjoy Underworld, and I haven't seen the sequel, but I found myself getting entirely caught up in the drama and, particularly, the action of this film. Michael Sheen was captivating, and immersive, not unlike Russell Crowe's Maximus from Gladiator.
6) Zombieland
My fiancee and I counted up how many zombie movies we have seen together, and we figure that in the last year, we have seen ten of them. Zombieland is almost certainly my favourite. Its humour (both meta and regular) and balls-to-the-walls zombie-stomping ass-kickery made it an undeniable popcorn-fisting good time.
5) Drag Me To Hell
This movie is just ridiculous. It starts off completely out of hand, and doesn't let up until the unforgiving finale, which includes one of my favourite moments in cinematic history. I couldn't find a screencap, so please just believe me when I tell you that just thinking about the look on Justin Long's face makes me pee with laughter.
4) Where The Wild Things Are
3) Star Trek
2) Inglourious Basterds
A lot of discussions of this movie involve sentences that start with "The Best Tarantino Movie Since..." Haters finish this sentence with Jackie Brown, while those who loved (myself included) it are more inclined to top it off with Pulp Fiction. Dialogue, brutality, and characterization make up the brilliance of this pseudo-historical yarn.
1) District 9
Sharlto Copley made this movie. His performance as a hunted outcast, struggling to avoid the military, maintain a relationship with his wife, learn about an incomprehensible alien race, and, oh yeah, try to figure out how to NOT turn into a giant prawn, is unlike anything I have seen before. Throw that all into a movie that also includes gunfights with unique, imaginative weaponry (although maybe a little too much), and you have, in my unhumble opinion, the best movie of 2009.
So anyway, the point is, I feel like 2009 has kind of been getting the shaft, since it's at the end of a decade, and everyone is worried about their decade lists. So, for your reading pleasure, I offer up the movies of 2009, that I have seen, listed from worst to best.
*Notable exceptions that I haven't seen (notable status being given by either 1) my wanting to see it, but not having gotten around to it 2) having it be ridiculously successful, and I can't stand feeling different from other people or 3) it coming strongly recommended:
-Paul Blart: Mall Cop, Coraline, Adventureland, The Hangover, (500) Days Of Summer, 9, Up In The Air
And here we go...
26) Dragonball: Evolution
Probably the worst movie I've seen since Freddy Got Fingered. There's just nothing salvageable about it. The lives of the people involved are forever tainted by their involvement in this abysmal violator of childhood memory.
25) The Unborn
It's been awhile. I saw this movie because it was the only thing playing when I dropped into the theatre between two classes. I had done the same a few weeks before and ended up seeing Slumdog Millionaire, so I'm batting .500 . Come to think of it, I remember having a vague interest in seeing it because my temporary man-crush on Cam Gigandet was in its waning stages. Either way, the movie was crap. It tried to be The Exorcist, and I remember something about Nazis, but by no means was it the best demonic possession movie this year.
24) Confessions Of A Shopaholic
If you're ever in the mood for a bad chick flick, where a spoiled girl learns the valuable lesson of sharing, you should still go somewhere else. This movie was the only real blemish on what I considered to be an otherwise perfectly executed surprise Valentine's Day date.
23) Angels & Demons
I'm probably the only person in the world who liked this book better than The DaVinci Code. While not loving the first movie, I resented seeing this one. All of the intrigue, brutality, and pseudo-intelligence that I remember from the book is stripped out, leaving me as cold and lifeless as Tom Hanks' Robert Langdon.
22) Inkheart
The badassery of one cool character (Paul Bettany's Dustfinger), didn't make up for the frustratingly lame elements of the film, for example, every other character. With the premise of a guy who can bring any book to life, the possibilities for where this could have gone were endless, so it's a real shame that where it ended up going was so mediocre.
21) Gamer
Much like the movie that precedes this one on the list, we found ourselves with what had the potential to be a really kick-ass movie, with witty dialogue and maybe even a tasteful warning message about digital media. Instead, we a mildly kick-ass movie, with lame dialogue, and a strong desire to play The Sims... if there were rocket launchers.
20) Year One
This movie was Typecasting 101. Michael Cera plays Michael Cera, while Jack Black plays Jack Black, in a mostly unfunny buddy pictures about two cavemen who make their way through various biblical locations. I can't endorse any movie that makes me disappointed to see Paul Rudd and David Cross.
19) Transformers: Revenge Of The Fallen
I don't really remember the first Transformers movie, except for the fact that I had no idea what was going on. Having not ever played with a Transformer, combined with my inability to keep track of what was going on, I really couldn't have cared less about the sequel. After seeing it, that opinion still stands. With such big, elaborate truck monsters, it's nearly impossible for me to understand which metal giant I am supposed to be cheering for. Also, when "the shard" makes everything it touches turn into a Transformer, it takes away from the relatability of the rest of them. I'm not going to care about some random robot from outerspace, if my toaster just became one.
18) Friday The 13th
The movie's earlier kills are fun and original. That's about all this has going for it, except Aaron Yoo, who I really enjoyed watching be the pathetic, funloving guy, who you're actually kind of sad to see minced up.
17) Push
16) The Twilight Saga: New Moon
15) Trick 'r Treat
14) Avatar
13) Watchmen
Rather than re-write what I think, I'm going to give you guys the contents of an e-mail I wrote to the University of Western Ontario's Gazette, in response to their glowing review:
As an English major, it is my job to see things from different perspectives, to accept divergent opinions, and to generally realize that when it comes to literature, there is no right or wrong. After reading Wednesday's review of Watchmen, I learned that it is very possible for someone to simply be wrong.
To be fair, I would like to set the stage for my own experience of seeing the movie. Despite being a comic book fan, I did not encounter (or even hear about) Watchmen until my second year at Western, when it was assigned as course reading for English 117: Reading Popular Culture. I enjoyed the book immensely. As the release date approached, it was not uncommon for me to go to YouTube to get a Watchmen fix via the film's Smashing Pumpkins-scored trailer. Anyone who knows a 10-17-year old girl will understand what I mean when I say that Watchmen was my Twilight.
Even still, this anticipation was always slightly dampened by doubt that the movie just wasn't going to work. As long as people have been trying to make a Watchmen movie, there have been people (including the graphic novel's author, Alan Moore) who have insisted that in adaptation, Watchmen loses its integrity and literary value. As tempting as it is to imagine Alan Moore as just some crotchety old bastard who has resisted the project for the sake of being a crotchety old bastard, his prediction was completely accurate.
Despite my fanboy status, I wasn't particularly upset or “distraught” about the plot changes. The altered ending makes a hell of a lot more sense for a movie than the original ending. There are some (and I have dabbled with this opinion) who believe that it is, in fact, a better ending. This ending brings the movie's characters closer together and removes the more supernatural elements, ultimately making the story more believable.
Where Watchmen fails is in its mere right to exist. Zack Snyder's goal was always to bring the graphic novel to the movie screen. The attention to visible detail is utterly astounding. Quite often, the film is simply beautiful in its visual translation. Snyder's storyboards (which he drew himself) were quite often taken straight from panels of the comic book. Subsequently, many of the film's scenes are authentically replicated animated tableaus. While this may have been successful technique in the much more visual experience of 300, the flawed, human characters of the Watchmen movie suffer for it. Where Snyder really faces a problem is that any time that there is a deviation from the text in order to make a better movie, the film loses its grip on the fundamental Watchmenness that he is trying so hard to retain. Ultimately it is a battle that is impossible to win. By keeping to the middle, trying to satisfy both camps, we end up with a movie that is neither great on its own nor an entirely faithful adaptation. So, what could Snyder have done better? Probably nothing aside from simply not doing it. Watchmen is not a movie. It is a comic book, and if any good has come from the movie, it is that it has brought people back to the original text. As sales of the graphic novel increase, the movie will serve as a temporary spotlight on a book that shines plenty brightly on its own and deserves its place on Time's “100 Best Novels” list.
As for Kaufman's assertion that the film is a “memorable movie experience which will benefit from repeated viewings”: I saw it twice. I can assure you that my feelings didn't change the second time around.
12) He's Just Not That Into You
This is where the list starts to get to the movies that I enjoyed. This flick was the other half of the aforementioned Valentine's Date, and it definitely got me more points than Confessions Of A Shopaholic did. Like Love, Actually before it (although not as good), HJNTIY is a heart-warming ensemble comedy with enough different, divergent stories to keep you interested and smitten. This movie also has the honour of being only one of two Drew Barrymore movies that I don't loathe (the other being Music & Lyrics).
11) Harry Potter And The Half-Blood Prince
Although not the strongest of the series (OOTP, FTW), Half-Blood Prince is a pretty good adaptation of the novel, as well as a pretty good movie.
10) X-Men Origins: Wolverine
I may be one of the only critics in the world who actually liked this movie (we must stand together, J.R. Jones of the Chicago Reader! I thought it was exciting and fun, but then again, I also enjoyed X-Men: The Last Stand so I must be crazy, right?
9) Sherlock Holmes
8) Up
This may not be the Wall-E-esque masterpiece that it has been made out to be, but it certainly is an enjoyable, touching, and original piece of work. Some of the jokes get a bit tired, and I found the last twenty minutes or so disappointing, but there isn't really any questioning that this was a good movie.
7) Underworld: Rise Of The Lycans
Here's another one that kind of snuck up. I didn't particularly enjoy Underworld, and I haven't seen the sequel, but I found myself getting entirely caught up in the drama and, particularly, the action of this film. Michael Sheen was captivating, and immersive, not unlike Russell Crowe's Maximus from Gladiator.
6) Zombieland
My fiancee and I counted up how many zombie movies we have seen together, and we figure that in the last year, we have seen ten of them. Zombieland is almost certainly my favourite. Its humour (both meta and regular) and balls-to-the-walls zombie-stomping ass-kickery made it an undeniable popcorn-fisting good time.
5) Drag Me To Hell
This movie is just ridiculous. It starts off completely out of hand, and doesn't let up until the unforgiving finale, which includes one of my favourite moments in cinematic history. I couldn't find a screencap, so please just believe me when I tell you that just thinking about the look on Justin Long's face makes me pee with laughter.
4) Where The Wild Things Are
3) Star Trek
2) Inglourious Basterds
A lot of discussions of this movie involve sentences that start with "The Best Tarantino Movie Since..." Haters finish this sentence with Jackie Brown, while those who loved (myself included) it are more inclined to top it off with Pulp Fiction. Dialogue, brutality, and characterization make up the brilliance of this pseudo-historical yarn.
1) District 9
Sharlto Copley made this movie. His performance as a hunted outcast, struggling to avoid the military, maintain a relationship with his wife, learn about an incomprehensible alien race, and, oh yeah, try to figure out how to NOT turn into a giant prawn, is unlike anything I have seen before. Throw that all into a movie that also includes gunfights with unique, imaginative weaponry (although maybe a little too much), and you have, in my unhumble opinion, the best movie of 2009.
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
50 Greatest Albums of All Time
*covering albums listened to from May 23, 2009 - February 25, 2011
50 The Who - Who's Next
49 Nirvana - MTV Unplugged In New York
48 Spinal Tap - Breaking Like The Wind
47 Red Hot Chili Peppers - Californication
46 Bob Dylan - Blonde On Blonde
45 Various Artists - Hedwig And The Angry Inch
44 Radiohead - OK Computer
43 Mika - Life In Cartoon Motion
42 Jean Leloup - Le Dôme
41 John Frusciante - The Will To Death
40 Simon & Garfunkel - Live 1969
39 Pearl Jam - Ten (Redux)
38 Arcade Fire - Funeral
37 John Mayer - Heavier Things
36 Led Zeppelin - Physical Graffiti
35 The Velvet Underground - The Velvet Underground
34 Ani Difranco - Revelling/Reckoning
33 Led Zeppelin - Coda
32 Bruce Springsteen - Born To Run
31 Patti Smith - Horses
30 Radiohead - Hail To The Thief
29 The Beatles - Revolver
28 Nine Inch Nails - The Downward Spiral
27 The Beatles - Magical Mystery Tour
26 Various Artists - The Lion King
25 The Beatles - The Beatles (White Album)
24 Queen - A Night At The Opera
23 Jeff Buckley - Mystery White Boy
22 Pink Floyd - Dark Side Of The Moon
21 Smashing Pumpkins - Mellon Collie And The Infinite Sadness
20 Pearl Jam - Yield
19 Smashing Pumpkins - Siamese Dream
18 The Bicycle Thief - You Come And Go Like A Pop Song
17 Led Zeppelin - Led Zeppelin III
16 Blind Melon - Soup
15 Toadies - Rubberneck
14 Jimi Hendrix - Are You Experienced
13 Bruce Springsteen - The Rising
12 T. Rex - Electric Warrior
11 Jimi Hendrix - Electric Ladyland
10 The Beatles - Abbey Road
9 Our Lady Peace - Gravity
8 Flight Of The Conchords - Flight Of The Conchords
7 Tom Waits - Swordfishtrombones
6 David Bowie - The Rise And Fall Of Ziggy Stardust And The Spiders From Mars
5 The Dandy Warhols - Thirteen Tales From Urban Bohemia
4 U2 - Achtung Baby
3 The White Stripes - Icky Thump
2 The Beatles - Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band
1 Jeff Buckley - Grace
Now I'm sure that this list is bound to illicit some reactions, mostly brutal. For one, I myself recognize that "Gravity" is probably a lot higher than most people would put it. It is my guilty pleasure album. It's incredibly easy on my ears, and I've been an OLP fan for a long time.
Also, there aren't any "Greatest Hits" or other compilation albums up here. That may be a Rundown for another day.
I plan to update this list as much as possible, whenever something cracks it, but if I don't, I apologize, quite insincerely.
50 The Who - Who's Next
49 Nirvana - MTV Unplugged In New York
48 Spinal Tap - Breaking Like The Wind
47 Red Hot Chili Peppers - Californication
46 Bob Dylan - Blonde On Blonde
45 Various Artists - Hedwig And The Angry Inch
44 Radiohead - OK Computer
43 Mika - Life In Cartoon Motion
42 Jean Leloup - Le Dôme
41 John Frusciante - The Will To Death
40 Simon & Garfunkel - Live 1969
39 Pearl Jam - Ten (Redux)
38 Arcade Fire - Funeral
37 John Mayer - Heavier Things
36 Led Zeppelin - Physical Graffiti
35 The Velvet Underground - The Velvet Underground
34 Ani Difranco - Revelling/Reckoning
33 Led Zeppelin - Coda
32 Bruce Springsteen - Born To Run
31 Patti Smith - Horses
30 Radiohead - Hail To The Thief
29 The Beatles - Revolver
28 Nine Inch Nails - The Downward Spiral
27 The Beatles - Magical Mystery Tour
26 Various Artists - The Lion King
25 The Beatles - The Beatles (White Album)
24 Queen - A Night At The Opera
23 Jeff Buckley - Mystery White Boy
22 Pink Floyd - Dark Side Of The Moon
21 Smashing Pumpkins - Mellon Collie And The Infinite Sadness
20 Pearl Jam - Yield
19 Smashing Pumpkins - Siamese Dream
18 The Bicycle Thief - You Come And Go Like A Pop Song
17 Led Zeppelin - Led Zeppelin III
16 Blind Melon - Soup
15 Toadies - Rubberneck
14 Jimi Hendrix - Are You Experienced
13 Bruce Springsteen - The Rising
12 T. Rex - Electric Warrior
11 Jimi Hendrix - Electric Ladyland
10 The Beatles - Abbey Road
9 Our Lady Peace - Gravity
8 Flight Of The Conchords - Flight Of The Conchords
7 Tom Waits - Swordfishtrombones
6 David Bowie - The Rise And Fall Of Ziggy Stardust And The Spiders From Mars
5 The Dandy Warhols - Thirteen Tales From Urban Bohemia
4 U2 - Achtung Baby
3 The White Stripes - Icky Thump
2 The Beatles - Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band
1 Jeff Buckley - Grace
Now I'm sure that this list is bound to illicit some reactions, mostly brutal. For one, I myself recognize that "Gravity" is probably a lot higher than most people would put it. It is my guilty pleasure album. It's incredibly easy on my ears, and I've been an OLP fan for a long time.
Also, there aren't any "Greatest Hits" or other compilation albums up here. That may be a Rundown for another day.
I plan to update this list as much as possible, whenever something cracks it, but if I don't, I apologize, quite insincerely.
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
5 Pop Culture Phenomena I Prejudicially Hate Without Giving A Fair Chance
5. The cast change in "The Twilight Saga"
It was announced months ago that Bryce Dallas Howard would replace Rachelle Lefevre as the evil vampire, Victoria, for the third installment of "The Twilight Saga" called "Eclipse." There are a few possible contributing factors to my responding rage. Maybe it's because Lefevre appears to have gotten a raw deal, maybe it's because casting changes are distracting, but at the end of the day, Lefevre didn't blow me away, and I care just a little bit less about Howard. The possibility that she may be a better actress, or even just better for the role, is not in any way relevent. The bottom line is that I care way more than I should.
4. The Jonas Brothers cover of "Rolling Stone" magazine:
I am outraged about this because others are outraged about this. I, however, have never heard the Jonas Brothers, and therefore cannot pretend to have any kind of opinion about them as musicians, celebrities, or people. Similarly, I have also never read a Rolling Stone magazine. I have a faint awareness of some kind of prior glory that has been "sold out" by putting pop stars on its cover, resulting in the furor that I am apparently being drug into.
3. Crossroads
In all fairness, this movie is likely garbage. I, however, cannot fairly make this judgment without having seen it. That does not stop me from using it as a reference point when talking about bad movies. I even made fun of it in my New Moon review. It's an interesting phenomenon that something has such a reputation for being bad that even I, someone who has never experienced it, can trust on its universal acceptance as crap. An yes, that is Uhura on the right.
2. Star Trek: Enterprise
I have fond memories of sitting with my family, watching the series finale of "Star Trek: The Next Generation." I also remember religiously tuning into "Star Trek: Voyager" from nearly start to finish during its entire run. I don't know if it was just Trekkie exhaustion or if I figured that things couldn't get any better, I hated "Enterprise" right from the get-go, without ever watching it.
1. The Buffy reboot
Despite it being Joss Whedon's love-child, Fran Rubel Kuzui owns the "Buffy The Vampire Slayer" franchise. She is the one who directed the original movie. That's the same movie that drove Whedon to atonement by way of the television series. Now, Kuzui is talking about starting over, and rebooting the franchise with all new characters and, most blasphemously, sans Whedon. While the first movie is a decent shitometer (that's like a barometer for the potency of shit) of what's to come, there is a distinct possibility that it will be good. Even if it is, I still hate it to death.
It was announced months ago that Bryce Dallas Howard would replace Rachelle Lefevre as the evil vampire, Victoria, for the third installment of "The Twilight Saga" called "Eclipse." There are a few possible contributing factors to my responding rage. Maybe it's because Lefevre appears to have gotten a raw deal, maybe it's because casting changes are distracting, but at the end of the day, Lefevre didn't blow me away, and I care just a little bit less about Howard. The possibility that she may be a better actress, or even just better for the role, is not in any way relevent. The bottom line is that I care way more than I should.
4. The Jonas Brothers cover of "Rolling Stone" magazine:
I am outraged about this because others are outraged about this. I, however, have never heard the Jonas Brothers, and therefore cannot pretend to have any kind of opinion about them as musicians, celebrities, or people. Similarly, I have also never read a Rolling Stone magazine. I have a faint awareness of some kind of prior glory that has been "sold out" by putting pop stars on its cover, resulting in the furor that I am apparently being drug into.
3. Crossroads
In all fairness, this movie is likely garbage. I, however, cannot fairly make this judgment without having seen it. That does not stop me from using it as a reference point when talking about bad movies. I even made fun of it in my New Moon review. It's an interesting phenomenon that something has such a reputation for being bad that even I, someone who has never experienced it, can trust on its universal acceptance as crap. An yes, that is Uhura on the right.
2. Star Trek: Enterprise
I have fond memories of sitting with my family, watching the series finale of "Star Trek: The Next Generation." I also remember religiously tuning into "Star Trek: Voyager" from nearly start to finish during its entire run. I don't know if it was just Trekkie exhaustion or if I figured that things couldn't get any better, I hated "Enterprise" right from the get-go, without ever watching it.
1. The Buffy reboot
Despite it being Joss Whedon's love-child, Fran Rubel Kuzui owns the "Buffy The Vampire Slayer" franchise. She is the one who directed the original movie. That's the same movie that drove Whedon to atonement by way of the television series. Now, Kuzui is talking about starting over, and rebooting the franchise with all new characters and, most blasphemously, sans Whedon. While the first movie is a decent shitometer (that's like a barometer for the potency of shit) of what's to come, there is a distinct possibility that it will be good. Even if it is, I still hate it to death.
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